Step 2: Hidden Submission
Hidden submission is submitting to your wife without her knowing it.
Hidden submission lets you experience submissiveness to your wife. Maybe you will start to feel some of the eroticism or comfort of submission, and you might learn something about being submissive. Your wife will be happier with you and your relationship. Clean submission also bring out her dominance. For example, if you do everything she asks, she becomes confident about asking you to do something.
A classic submissive fantasy is serving a Mistress. Imagining yourself as your wife's slave or servant, and serve her.
Service is clean submission. Imagine in cave man times, you would go hunting when you were hungry. But once you had a family, your would go hunting because she told you to. Then you were providing for her and your family. Service. A submissive without kinks would still serve.
Service probably won't work well for you if you don't enjoy it. But if you do, you are attacking at your wife's most vulnerable point.
Voluntary service, doing something without being asked, is great. It will soften her up. There is also value in waiting for her to ask you to do something. If you act happy to serve and do your task quickly and well, trust me she will ask again. You might also greet her request with and enthusiastic "Yes my queen", "I am at your service", or "Your wish is my command."
You can also do sexual service. This is very easy to hide..
A second hidden submission is treating her like a goddess. Some classic examples are massage and giving her a foot bath. These should be done sensuously and luxuriously. There is a long page on goddess worship. If she emotionally lets you do this, it transforms her into a caring goddess.
If you have sex with your wife, an excellent hidden service is voluntary chastity. You might vow to not masturbate at all for a month, or not to masturbate except when she is having her period. Chastity is a classic submissive fantasy, and it increases your need for your wife. You cannot have sex unless she agrees, so she has power over you even if she doesn't know it. It also will improve your sex life with her, again warming her up and improving your relationship.
You empower her when you take her suggestions seriously. Suppose she says you might like a particular book. You might rather she ordered you to try the book and punish you if you didn't. But you can accept her suggestion submissively -- be eager to please, try the book, report to her like a good sub, and let her know you appreciate her suggestion even if you didn't like the book. This empowers her to take a more active role in controlling your life.
During this time, you should also shape her dominance.
Step 1. Understanding
Step 3. One Foot out of the Closet
Step 4. Telling Her