SUBMISSION AND KINKS
You were probably born with the trait of submissiveness. You want to please others. That's good. You probably submit to a higher moral code, which is very good. You are probably a caring person. Be proud of your submissiveness. You are a caring person who could make a wonderful husband.
You also need something like control, or someone to submit to. In society now, that is almost impossible to find. You should be submitting to your wife. But no one told her what to do. So don't blame her, but she won't provide the control or dominance you need. You might even turn off your submissiveness to protect yourself. How sad.
Kinks & Guilt
Without control or submission, you kink. Kinks are your fantasies about being controlled. Being tied up, the strong dominatrix, the irresistably beautiful dominatrix, you being weak and easily controlled, you being denied sex and overwhelmed with need, you having low status so she can easily dominate you. The list goes on. You cannot control your kinks, so do not feel guilty about them.
You might have acted on your kinks. If no one was hurt, do not feel guilty about this either. You have a right to try to be happy. You probably tried to resist your kinks. That didn't work, because no one can live without trying to be happy.
To reduce your kinks, you can
- avoid guilt
- seek caring domination from your wife
- not let people make you weaker. Humiliation, degradation, guilt, and punishment usually make you weaker.
Submission somehow triggers a romantic crush on the dominant. The word crush is not meant to trivialize this feeling, it is very strong and very powerful. You will need her attention and approval, and you will want to please her. Don't you think your wife should have this crush? Don't you think she would want it? And with caring domination, the crush does turn to love.
So you are unhappy because you have no one to submit to. Your wife is unhappy because she does not have your love. Your sex life probably isn't that good.
Our style of domination, called caring domination, was designed to be good for you and at least acceptable to her. It brings love and intimacy to your relationship.
She will want an obedient knight, and you will enjoy being her knight. She might satisfy some of your kinks or she might not, but your kinks will not be as important to you. You will be content, guilt-free, and happy.
To learn more about caring domination, go to http://www.cair4.com. There are no links from there to this section of the website.
Step 2. Hidden Submission
Step 3. One Foot out of the Closet
Step 4. Telling Her